Sunday, November 12, 2006

LETTING GO



...of my need to always be in control...
...of clutching for life so hard the water streams through my fingertips...
...of the expectation that I should drive myself along the rutted roads I once thought laid out just for me...
...of my belief of how children should be...
...of what love would become...
...of who my friends are...
...of my fears about letting myself be the passenger in life, as I learn that the best situations, relationships, and gifts come when I let myself go wherever the tides take me...
...of what I thought thirty-one would feel like...
...of my shadows...
...of my labels...
...of my old identity...
...of my lifetime of mermaid-long hair...

Link

25 Comments:

Blogger Delaleuverses said...

I wish I had hair like yours :) Great pics

11:19 AM  
Blogger rising to the challenge said...

Do my eyes deceive me? Or have you really cut your hair to just-below-shoulder length?

You are so brave!!
I had a haircut myself the other day and for the first time in over a decade I've now got a fringe. What happened was I had a flash of self-confidence overcome me while I was sitting there and the sytlist's scissors was snipping and so when she suggested I go with a fringe (as she has done every SINGLE time she has cut my hair -i.e. about 3 times a year for the last 5 years!), instead of chickening out and saying no, I said, OK, go on! I instantly felt a mixture of pride in my capacity to finally make a change (albeit tiny) and terror at the thoughts of looking at a new me in the mirror.
Some people get a major boost from changing their image from time to time, but I inevitably get a few days of insecurity until I get used to the new look.

I'm working on it though (...trying to stop myself from constantly clipping back this new fringe and waiting for it to grow out so that I look like I always did and can feel comfortable with it... so petty, I know!)

So, yes, let's let go...
Consciously decide to stop holding on. To whatever.

I think it's the little things we hold on to so tightly because they give us security.

So hears to your brave release... Hears to letting go!

Vanessa
xxx

3:03 PM  
Blogger Becoming Amethyst said...

I hear you like the tides rushing in and out, Delia (or maybe the image of rushing in and out just lives me since starting nanowrimo twelve days ago - only twelve? you gotta be kidding me!)
i hear you because i'm on that journey with you and i feel honoured and blessed at our burgeoning friendship, a gift to me.
beautiful post and i can't wait to see a more revealing head and shoulder shot - i bet you look stunning :-)
x x x x x

3:09 PM  
Anonymous krista said...

Wow! that was a great post, and how totally weird it must feel to have your hair shorter! I bet it looks great, healthy and fresh!

7:05 PM  
Blogger Brad said...

Thanks for inspiring me to: take the wheel and throw out the drivers manual.

bg

7:17 PM  
Anonymous acumamakiki said...

Letting go is liberating and something I have to consciously tell myself to do. I LOVE that you've cut your hair, that is a huge move and it must have a lot of emotion tied to the whole experience. I imagine things coming up that weren't expected.....just another thing to let go. I love the length and I love the bounce!

9:12 PM  
Blogger GoGo said...

I hear ya. Nice prompt response...and nice hair cut.

9:54 PM  
Blogger January said...

Wow, did you cut your hair? How do you feel now? Change is a good thing, as you well know. And it's hair--it grows back.

I have the opposite hair problem--and I have the weaves to prove it!

Awesome post, my dear!

10:37 PM  
Anonymous pluto said...

What a stunning post. That was truly art!

11:59 PM  
Blogger Deb R said...

Wow, check it out - what a change!! Are you happy with it? From what I can see in the photos I think I'd love it both ways. You have such gorgeous hair.

And BTW, both those photos - Glam. Totally Glam. Just sayin'...

12:10 AM  
Blogger Amber said...

Oh! The symbolic hair cut!! LOVE that. I know you look beautiful, too. I bet your eyes and amazing lips just pop.(Um, do I sound a little gay? LOL.Well, you ARE lovely!)

I once had hair to my ass. And I cut it all off into a pixie! Kory about shit himself, and then tried really hard to act like he liked it. Ha! But it was POWERFUL for me! I was shedding so much "old", and doing so much work on myself, and cutting the hair was such a brave move for me, totally symbolic of me letting go...

I hope you love it, sweetheart. And look at you. Only 31 years old, and you have accomplished so much! I really admire you. I do.

ox :)

12:38 AM  
Blogger deirdre said...

Oh, the power of letting go. If only it was easier to actually allow ourselves to do. A major haircut is a huge symbol of life change. It's good you're so aware of what's happening and able to embrace the shift.

4:55 AM  
Blogger The Whole Self said...

i recently cut off my two long hippie braids, and while i love having short hair now, it was hard to let go of that piece of my "personality" (even though it was just hair!).

i think you look great- you go!

7:31 AM  
Blogger Susannah said...

oh my god, you cut your hair! GO YOU! okay, i need to see more pictures immediately, though i know already that you look fabulous... i missed you while i was away, sweet friend... email on its way :-) xox L

7:48 AM  
Blogger Ali la Loca said...

Love it!!!

Good for you. I love getting haircuts that are actually quite radical. I've never been afraid, sometimes have regretted it afterwards, but never been afraid to take the plunge. I can't wait to see a full picture.

I really like your take on this prompt. It is really important to be able to relinquish control sometimes.

Also, loving the amber pendant in this photo. I've got my amber ring on today!

9:50 AM  
Blogger melba said...

Letting go is sooo difficult to do. Acknowledging the areas you want to let go of is so healthy and the beginning of a new life.

Are you 31 today? November 13? My sister's birthday is today. I just spoke with her. Happy Birthday if it is around now.

I really can't wait to see pictures of your hair since I have been debating about cutting mine off.

11:45 AM  
Blogger my pink sky said...

i love this post, light and freeing! yes, letting go is often one of the hardest things to do. you are so brave...and cutting your hair - especially so. some of us hang onto our long lockes for safety and for a safe place ti hide. can't wait to see the short-haired you.

1:14 PM  
Blogger paris parfait said...

Cutting one's hair can be such an empowering experience. And sometimes, we really do have to just "let go" to make room for other things to happen. Anyway, your hair is still long and beautiful, just not as long as you're used to. I'm sure it suits your beautiful face. Lovely post, as always.

1:17 PM  
Blogger yioeng said...

hi, i linked through poetry thursday and although i intended to comment for ur poem, it seems like you've already updated... but that's why we call them blogs right? they are meant to be updated frequently, i guess...
so anyway, i think i'm talking shit here, so i'll get to the point which is that i really liked ur poem though i had to read it twice to discern its meaning... really strong
about the letting go, i think we should just move away whatever it is that burdens our soulders, if any

2:31 PM  
Blogger b/sistersshoes said...

did you cut it?
and you're not letting us see?

*sigh*

you are gorgeous!

smooches,
darlene xoxoxo

4:34 PM  
Blogger Jane Poe (aka Deborah) said...

What a beautiful reminder of how when let go, we create the space for something else to happen. Beautifully stated. much peace, JP

8:40 PM  
Blogger Letha Sandison said...

This is so beautiful!! I love letting go, moving on, leaving old unuseful patterns behind.

Your hair looks beautiful!

10:46 PM  
Blogger Dan said...

Beautifully written, so gently Taoist and Buddhist. The Taoists call it wu wei, non-forcing ... in a sense 'going with the flow' though not exactly.

9:08 AM  
Blogger Laini Taylor said...

Love the phrase "mermaid-long hair". I was never able to grow my hair that long -- it's not quite thick enough. Hope you're enjoying it! This piece was lovely.

12:22 PM  
Blogger Lilian said...

You're brave. And lucky in the first place tht you can have long hair. Mine can't be grown. It's to fine and curly, it breaks and just won't go below the shoulders.

Yes, cutting one's hair is definitely "letting go"...

11:18 AM  

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